Spiderman 3 - Shit-tastic

Movie: Spiderman 3

Watched: In Bed

Date: 10 August

Review.

This is the thing i hated most about this movie:

Tobey Maguire's stupid face.  Not that his face is, in and of itself stupid: i find him far more attractive than the beefcake type actors (please don't start me on Ryan Reynolds before The Green Lantern) but he constantly pulls That Face.  Someone's in danger? The Stupid Face.  He's happy? The Stupid Face.  He's sad because his oldest friend is dying? The Stupid Face.   I wished by the end of the film that I had within me say, the superpowers of Storm, so I could electrocute the fuck out of him every time he pulled that Stupid  Goddamn Face.

As well.  Bad Spiderman/Peter is most clearly symbolised with slightly different hair, and black clothing. Good Spiderman/Peter has neater hair, and BLUE AND RED uniform.  This was just me reading too much into it, until the great bit when Spiderman Flies VICTORIOUSLY before the American Flag.    The use as 'ugly' as a marker of evil, or the constant use of 'blackness' as a marker of evil makes me uncomfortable. 

Peter and Mary Jane:  What is With This?  I know, the Hollywood invention of Love is stupid.  But these people have no common ground. Do we even see one conversation which shows any sort of connection between the two of them? I honest to god detest the way relationships are modeled in mass media.  That out there, there is a one true love, which once you have found, you become a new human being.  The idea that the one we love helps us be better people is never the point, nor is the fact that you probably want to connect on some level with this person. Nope.  You will just willingly sacrifice everything for the idea of Love.

This is across all of these movies: sacrifice and LOVE.  The love is occasionally complex and interesting, based on what seems to be relationships shared between people who genuinely have an intimacy, a shared life, growing together and trying to work as two individuals to build a life.  But then, you have The Romantic Lead who's often nothing better than an aesthetically pleasing woman who needs saving, over and over again. 

At least X-Men breaks from that (even if the film shits on the fact that Jane could have blown them all up without another care) but even then, it's a man who saves Jane from herself. Clearly, she's incapable still of her own decisions, abilities, direction and faculties and needs a Big Muscular Aesthetically Pleasing Man to fight for her and make her do the right thing. Heaven forbid a woman make up her own mind!

The storyline was also erratic and irritating, and the characters were extraordinarily thin.

It was probably the first movie I've felt irritated enough during to almost not want to finish it, but I think that's more because I'm sick at the moment. 

Movie Two: X-Men (from 2000. the first one)

Film: X-Men

Date seen: 3 August, 2011

Location: In Bed

Beverages: none 

Companionship: apart from briefly discussing the fact that Patrick Stewart was in it (i did not know, and i got excited) with the guy in Arizona i have a spectacularly gratuitous crush on - none.  Dom was out drinking with her father.  

Rating: 7 out of 10. 


The Review (of sorts)


It's a dour week in the Reform School For Girls (which is the code name for our apartment.)  Both Dom and I have distant parents visiting, which is not ... ideal.  I had to see my psychiatrist, who was customarily useless.  (he asked me if i read, because i mentioned i found canberra boring. then he complimented my glasses. it felt like he was trying to flirt with me, and i felt very uncomfortable).  Generally, I went into this one feeling Very Fucking Shit.


However. Patrick. motherfucking. Stewart.  Seriously. His voice is so soothing.  He knows things, people. I bet Patrick Stewart can read minds.  


I'd seen X-Men: First Class in the cinema, mostly because Lachlan wanted to, and I'm fairly easily led.  So this gave me some idea of context.    I was pleased that the pleasing young Professor Xavier grew up to be Patrick Stewart.  Even if these movies came before.  


I liked that people flew!  I liked that once again, the bully verses the world, self-preservation as the only way violence can be done, because it's Righteous Violence, but oh well, there are baddies who attack us so we can show off our exceptional skills with flying and blowing shit up, and moving metal and magical healing shit.  I also like that they all have different powers. 


Anything with hidden walls in it also thrills me in a really childlike way. i never get sick of seeing how the different movies all have different sorts of hidden walls/doors/corridors.  


Wolverine has long sharp THINGS that fly out of him. That is also pretty rad.  


Gender in X-Men is less fucked up than in Captain America. And i know - Captain America was being true to the time, and contextually, that is how women are portrayed.  One thing that i think is interesting to note in terms of how the bodies are represented is that the male form is as much exploited and lifted on high - firm muscular male bodies.  But it's done for very different reasons.  It's not to be eye-catching, or seductive, but it's more of a fact of life that a successful young man must be physiologically fit.  It's early days, here, kids, but the bare-chested Wolverine introduced an interesting question of the role of the male gaze on the male.  I think that's important - as important as the question of the male gaze on the females.


Now. i feel pretty subnormal tonight, so i'm pondering Being Hardcore and watching the next one.  i also got about 15 rows done on my hat.